A reason for everything.

They say, "Everything happens for a reason." and in some cases, I'm fairly quick to agree with that. I believe the relationship with my ex happened for a reason; to teach me a few life lessons.
This is going to be a post about my ex, the relationship we had, and the lessons I learned. It's not going to be a 'bitter ex' type post though.

I feel like my own life story was a way to teach me a hard lesson about life, and relationships. He and I are separated now, and our relationship was a HARD learned lesson for both of us. We started out well enough, but the relationship quickly deteriorated into something terrible. We weren't good for each other, I think neither of us truly knew what a real relationship should be. We spent just under ten years with almost constant fighting, but staying together because we thought that was the right thing to do for our children. We were both absolutely miserable though. I think deep down we both knew it was a crappy choice to stay together, but neither of us had wanted to take those steps to end things. In part, I think it was because maybe we both were afraid of being alone, and because we both had the idea that a child needed their parents to be together. Thankfully we both got our heads on right, and decided to finally end things. We have both grown so much from that experience though, and I'm thankful for our sakes, and the kids sakes. He's still in the kids lives, and with a wonderful woman who has helped him grow as a person, and loves our kids like they were her own. I couldn't be happier for him! People have asked "Cassie, why do you still talk to him?!" the short answer is, "because I have to, for the kids."

The longer answer, is because I want to. Being in that relationship with him, and now being in my current relationship has taught me a HELL of a lot about growing up, and doing things the REAL 'right way'.
"What?! You want to?...Why?!" a person might ask...Well, here's my reasoning. What I wanted to do, was to show our children that even though two people might have a HORRIBLE romantic relationship, they can still love their children and get along with each other. I didn't want them to see the bitterness between he and I anymore. Even though we were a wretched couple, he's still the one who helped me create three beautiful children. That tie will always be there, and can't be erased, nor would I even if that was possible. I hold no anger toward him, instead I look back on our time together as though it was a lesson in life and relationships. It taught me that stubbornness in certain situations can be detrimental to ones health and happiness. I do still care about him as a person, and I want him to be happy in his new relationship, and successful in his future endeavors.